Author: mallorie6302

Hi, I am Mallorie Mendence, APR, a working public relations and special events professional at the University of Tennessee, Knoxville. I live in Maryville, TN, with my husband, two young children, and three cats. If life were not already chaotic enough between working full time and raising two children under the age of five, I decided to throw getting my master’s degree into the mix. Why be boring, right? Amid diapers, papers, work, endless amounts of laundry, and daily stresses, life is a chaotic mess and certainly never calm. In Mom Before the Storm, I will cover the daily parenting struggles that all parents experience but might be reluctant to share. I hope my chaotic life experiences inspire others to see that being present over perfect really is attainable even with you see no light at the end of the tunnel. Buckle up, it’s going to be a bumpy but fun ride!

Summer camp fun

I have been on a mom mission this week to find summer camps for my daughter. I never knew there were so many to choose from. Everything from art, dance, STEM, enrichment, cheer, softball, and more. Of course, she wants to do them all but that just isn’t possible with the cost.

With so many camps to choose from, I have been wondering how to pick. Luckily for me, the Knoxville mom’s blog has provided a comprehensive listing of all of the camps in the surrounding area with all of the information I need. This has been a life saver for me. I just don’t have hours on end to dedicate to finding camps. I think we have settled on four camps for the summer. That is enough to keep her teacher dad from going crazy at home with two kids all summer. Do you have any local camps you would recommend? If so, leave me a comment.

Support from the grandparents

I am not sure what I would do without the support of my parents (my children’s grandparents). Just a few weeks ago, all three of the grandparents teamed up to help watch my kids while my husband and I went on a five-day vacation without the kids. It is not often that we get to spend time like that together, and I am forever thankful for the grandparents for stepping us to help us in the midst of their busy work schedules.

Not only did they help us while we were on vacation but they regularly watch our kids so that we can continue to have at least two date nights a month. I seriously would lose my sanity without them.

I was so glad to find this blog post about how grandparents that help with their grandchildren can actually also benefit health wise. I related so much to this post and also just want to shout a big thank you to my kid’s grandparents because we could not do this without them!

Explaining death to children

While I typically try to keep my blog topics light, this week’s topic sits heavy on heart. My grandmother (my children’s great grandmother) was diagnosed with incurable leukemia a few months ago and only has a matter of months left to live. Of course, this news has been very hard on me and my dad, but I also have to think about how it will affect my children. My son is likely too young to understand, but my daughter will certainly feel the effects. We have been talking about great grandma going to heaven, but I felt I needed more to help break it down in an age appropriate way so that she can express her feelings.

My grandmother pictured with my daughter when she was a newborn.

I was so happy to find another mommy blogger that recommended some wonderful books that will help us explain this better to our children.

Death of a loved one is certainly a difficult topic. If you have any advice, please feel free to leave your suggestions in the comments.

Play ball!

Now that tee ball season is here, I am reminded just how difficult it is to be a parent and a coach. I always try to get out of coaching but that never seems to go my way. Instead, the teams are always short volunteers, and I end up helping. Not that it isn’t rewarding, but coaching my own child is very difficult. She doesn’t listen to me and it makes for a frustrating experience for both of us. While I am coaching tee ball, I was able to find a very helpful list of “6 steps for coaching your child” from the USA Football blog. Even though it is a different sport, the tips can really apply to any support.

The one most important tip that has really stayed with me is to not coach my child at home unless they ask for it. It is hard for me when we practice at home not to be the coach but rather the supportive parent. I am hopefully making strides to be better at home.

Are you a coach to your child? If so, please leave any helpful tips in the comments.

Toys…everywhere

Our home has been taken over my tiny humans and toys. Seriously though, we have toys everywhere. So much so that I have asked the grandparents to stop buying toys. Rather, if they want to gift our children with anything, they can do clothes, diapers, or other experiential gifts like summer camps, vacation spending money, and more. While this request has certainly helped cut down on the number of incoming toys, I am still fighting the battle with the toys we have.

I try to be organized, but I feel like my organizing is just lacking. Or maybe I just need to do a major toy clean out? In looking for an answer, I found a blog post on tips for a stress-free toy purge. After reading the blog, I am convinced it is time for a toy overhaul. Wish me luck and send me any other good tips you have!

Do kids ever stop talking?

Seriously, my children never stop talking. Even my two-year-old is babbling a lot. My five-year-old takes it to a whole new level most days because she is also loud. Combined with her never ending talking, I often find it very difficult to get a word in with them. While I don’t want to squash their creativity and their outlet to express their feelings, sometimes I also just want five minutes of no talking. My mom swears this is payback because I apparently was also a very chatty child.

I often get frustrated that I can’t speak and when I do, neither of them listen. I found a very helpful blog that gives me seven steps to try to get my children to listen without nagging or yelling. I am looking forward to trying these steps to see if it improves the communication with them. Have you been through this same situation? If so, feel free to leave a comment on how I can improve.

Sick all the time…

This past fall was rough in our house. We were all getting sick. Everything from sinus infections to strep throat, my household was taken over by illness. Of course, this makes it very difficult as a working parent. Who takes off from work each day when you have a sick child? The struggle is real, especially since I am also in graduate school at the moment. I have argued about this with my husband more times than I care to admit but it is a serious issue.

We have found that taking turns seems to be the best resolution. On the days we are both busy, we try to split the day evenly so that we can both get work done. On days where extra help is available, I have even paid a babysitter to help me at home so that I can get work done during the day.

Last time he was sick this fall he took a nap while eating lunch!

While I have taken the opposite advice than this Working Mother blog, I am trying to find the balance in at all.

How do you handle your children’s illnesses when you are working?

Toddler meltdowns

My son recently celebrated his second birthday and you know what that means…terrible two’s. Really, I think the terrible two’s start at about 18 months. Either way, it is no fun for parents. The constant toddler meltdowns are not easy to deal with day in and out.

His favorite meltdown is to just lay down and scream when he doesn’t get his way. After refreshing myself on this stage thanks to the Scary Mommy blog, I know that I am not alone in waging this war.

In all seriousness, I have just been walking away and giving him no attention when he throws his tantrum. So far, I think it is working. I am seeing a reduction in the number of tantrums per day.

If you have any advice on toddler tantrums, please feel free to leave me a comment!

Mean Girls

Maybe it is just me but I am already experiencing flashbacks to the movie Mean Girls when my daughter comes home and complains about her friends. While it doesn’t happen every day (thank goodness), she is often struggling with how to deal with friends that are “mean” or don’t include her in play. I know it is a rite of passage for every child, but my heart can’t help feel for her.

She has the biggest heart and always includes others so she just has a very hard time understanding when her friends don’t treat her the same way. Of course, she isn’t perfect, but most of the time is very considerate of other’s feelings.

I struggle with what to tell her about it. How much is too much? Do I crush her now to prepare her for middle and high school? I am just having the hardest time with this issue. For those of you that may be experiencing this yourself, please leave some advice in the comments.